Sunshine and Rain and a Carton of Milk
by Daniel R. Snyder
“Wake up, honey. Time to get up.”
It was cold last night and my
back hurts. The sun’s gonna be up pretty soon. I can see it hiding just
behind those fancy hills where all the rich people live. The sky’s all
orange and blue and there’s white clouds just hanging over the
mountains. The sun’s right below and it makes them look like feather
pillows, but the tops are all black and it looks like it might rain.
Actually, I know it’s gonna rain cause I can feel it in my bones, and
these old bones never lied to me. When my shoulder hurts like this,
sure as God’s coming, I know it’s gonna rain. Not that I mind the rain
too much, but Pip don’t like it at all so we gotta find a place to stay
dry.
“C’mon, lazy bones. Milk truck’s gonna be here soon.”
Pip’s getting old. Guess we both
are. Difference is he don’t know it. Things like that just don’t cross
his mind. If he wants to sleep, then he sleeps and there’s no telling
him not to. It’s a good place to sleep and nobody really bothers us too
much. The concrete’s a little hard but we usually sleep on some
cardboard, and then it’s not so bad and the ground don’t seem so cold
either. We got a couple blankets, and me and Pip curl up just as cozy
as you please. But we always get up early cause this is where the big
milk truck comes every morning and we gotta be out of the way.
“Good morning, sleepy head. Thought you were gonna sleep till tomorrow.”
Sometimes we kind of stand off aways and watch him unload the truck.
He’s a big fat man with a red beard and his arms are big around as fire
hydrants. But he’s a nice man and once he even said hello. I didn’t say
nothing back cause I’m not really used to talking much, except to Pip.
I talk to Pip a lot and I don’t have to worry I might say something
stupid or wrong. He don’t say much back but he always listens. So we
watch him roll the cartons into the store, and he leaves the side doors
of the truck open and we can see all that milk just sitting there.
Sometimes I think about sneaking up real quiet and snatching one when
nobody’s looking. But I done without for so long there’s no use in
getting in trouble over it now. Besides, I never took nothing that
belonged to somebody else and I’m not gonna start now. Truth is, I
wouldn’t even think about it if it weren’t for Pip. I bet he’d like
some this morning. Maybe I’ll have enough to buy him some soon. Bet
he’d really like that.
“That’s it. We got a little time
left, honey. You go ahead and make yourself pretty. Gotta look pretty
cause you never know, you just might meet someone special today.”
First thing he does in the
morning is take a bath. And he’s real careful that he cleans all the
way from the tip of his tail to his nose. Last thing he does is lick
his paws and wash his face. Guess it’d be nice if I could take a bath
every day too, but it’s such a long walk to the park now.
Lord knows, I’m just getting too old. Don’t like to think about it
much, and I never talk to Pip about it, but I know it won’t be long
till the Lord’s gonna take me. Truth is, he could take me to heaven
right now and I wouldn’t mind, if it weren’t for Pip. He’d be all alone
and wouldn’t know what to do. He’s too old and slow to catch anything,
and fact is, last time he got in a trash can he was too tuckered out
from trying to get in and he couldn’t jump out. Had to crawl in after
him. Besides, he’s got a bad leg and he’d probably get caught by a dog.
That’s why I got the leash.
“Hear that? It’s the milk truck, honey.”
Took me more than a week to save
enough to buy his leash. Don’t like to ask for charity and wouldn’t do
it for myself but I was worried about him. He likes to wander and I
just don’t have the energy to chase him anymore. So I stood out in
front of the store asking for change until I had enough. Most folks
just ignored me. Some said some pretty nasty things, but the ones that
did give a little change just kind of laughed or felt sorry for me.
Probably they figured I was gonna use it to buy a bottle. Course, I
never bothered telling them the truth cause they’d never believe me, so
I just took the change and told them God bless you. I could have used a
rope, I suppose. But that just don’t seem dignified enough for him.
Salvation Army just down the street had a beautiful leash and collar I
been looking at for a long time. It was all pretty and pink and the
leash matched the collar and it was covered with shiny rhinestones.
Once I saw it, Pip wasn’t gonna have nothing less. And when I gave it
to him, he liked it, too. I put the collar round his neck and he kind
of lifted his head and strutted around for a while all proud looking.
The truck pulls in and I pick him
up. He feels so light, and I can feel his ribs sticking out under his
fur. Sure would like to get him some milk.
“There it is, Pip. Look at all that milk. Sure would be nice to have some, wouldn’t it?”
The man with the beard gets out
and starts unloading. Then he turns and looks and sets the cart down
and starts walking toward us. I pull Pip in close to my chest so he
won’t be scared. The man holds his arms out like he thinks I might be
scared too. I’m not really, but I never seen him this close, and he
reminds me of Johnathan. God rest his soul.
“Hi,” he says.
I say hello and he reaches out
toward Pip and starts to scratch. Pip waves his tail around like he’s
angry, but the man keeps scratching, and then Pip starts to purr.
“Umm...nice cat. Is he yours?”
I’m not sure what to say, but I try anyway.
“No. He’s not really mine. We’re...well...just friends.”
“He’s pretty.”
He stops scratching and puts his
hands in his pockets and kind of looks away like he’s not sure what to
say. He looks uncomfortable, and I think maybe he wants us to go. I
turn and start to walk away.
“Wait,” he says. “Please don’t go. I didn’t mean to...I just wanted...”
I set Pip down on the ground and
let the leash out all the way. It’s long enough so he can reach the
man. Pip walks over and rubs against his legs. He’s purring real loud.
“Look,” he says, “I see you here
every day and I just thought...well, I've got some milk here and I just
thought you might like a little...”
“We don’t take charity.”
I remember that look. Johnathan
used to look that way when his feelings were hurt. Always made me want
to put my arms around him and make him feel better. I shouldn’t think
about my husband because it always makes me cry, and I’m crying now. I
turn my head cause I’m ashamed, but I can’t stop cause I miss him so
much. I hope the Lord takes Pip the same time he takes me, so we can
all be together. Johnathan never met Pip, but I know he’d like him. And
he’d probably be glad I had somebody to keep me company all these
years. Some day all three of us are gonna live in heaven and be happy
forever.
He pulls out a tissue from his
pocket and gives it to me. He’s such a nice man. I wipe my eyes and he
walks back to the truck. He comes back with a bowl and some milk. I
watch him fill it and then he gives the rest to me.
“It’s not charity. Your friend looks hungry. Call it a gift.”
Pip is already at the bowl and
lapping it up. I don’t mind it for Pip, but I don’t want to feel like I
owe anybody nothing.
“Please?”
He looks at me with Johnathan’s sad eyes. I take it.
“Thank you.”
He smiles and then I don’t feel
so bad. He kneels down and scratches Pip’s back, and Pip raises his
rump in the air and purrs and keeps lapping up the milk. I look at the
half empty carton in my hand.
“Go ahead. It’s for you,” he says.
I don’t want to hurt his
feelings, so I take a sip. It’s good and sweet and cold and it tastes
even better than I remember. Pip must be really happy getting scratched
and having fresh milk to drink. I wish I could give it to him every day
just like I used to give it to our little Kathy. I spill a little of
the milk when I think about her. She was such a little thing when the
Lord took her away from us. But I put that thought away too because I
miss her just like I miss Johnathan and I don’t want the man to see me
crying again. I pick up Pip and hold him close.
“Look,” he says, “I gotta finish
unloading. It won’t take long. Can you wait for a couple minutes?”
“Why?” I ask.
“Please?”
“Alright.”
I set Pip down and he goes back
to the milk. I undo his leash. He’s not going anywhere for a while with
a bowl of milk in front of him. I sit down on the pavement and watch
the man roll the first cart into the store. Pip finishes his milk and
crawls into my lap. He kneads my skirt with his claws to get
comfortable. He sounds so happy. I remember the milk in my hand and
drink the rest. It’s been so long since I had some, and I’m sad when
it’s gone. He loads another cart and winks at us and wheels it in.
I’m sitting here, stroking Pip’s
soft fur and wondering why the man is doing this, wondering why he
asked me to wait. He’s inside for a long time and I start to wonder if
maybe he changed his mind and doesn’t want to see us anymore. But
then he comes out carrying something, and he’s smiling Johnathan’s
smile. Something smells warm and good, and it’s coming from the bag
he’s holding.
“I got you something.”
I’m just too surprised to argue.
He hands me something wrapped in bright foil. I take it and gently
unwrap it. A hot sandwich with fresh bread and cheese dripping down the
sides. I look up at him like I don’t know what I’m supposed to do with
it, but I do, I just don’t understand why.
“Go ahead. It’s breakfast. Don’t mind me. Already had mine.”
I take a small bite and my tongue
tingles and it burns the top of my mouth but I chew and chew and it’s
just so good and I know I’m crying again.
“And I got something for you
too,” he says to Pip. He pulls out a tin of cat food and opens it with
a pocketknife and sets it on the ground. Pip’s nose twitches and he
jumps off my lap and straight toward the food. I take another bite of
the sandwich. Steam rises into the air from the center. I can hear Pip
gulping and chewing. I finish the sandwich and lick my fingers clean.
He starts to say something but
there’s a big crack of thunder. We both look at the sky. It’s grey and
black now.
“Jeez...it’s coming fast,” he says.
“I knew it was going to rain.”
“Yeah, me too. But I didn’t think it’d be here so soon.”
The sun’s up but it’s hiding
behind the black clouds. It’s getting cold and my shoulder tells me the
rain’s gonna come soon. Pip finishes the can and licks it clean. The
man scratches Pip’s ears while Pip washes his face and licks his chops.
The sky lights up with lightening and then the thunder cracks again and
Pip jumps into my lap. He hates the rain and we gotta find a spot to
stay dry soon. The man looks at his watch.
“Six thirty already. I’m really
sorry...but I have to go. I've got three more deliveries before
eight.”
I don’t know what to say. Thank
you don’t seem like enough, but I don’t have anything to give him for
his kindness. I realize I don't even know his name, this nice man
with Johnathan’s eyes.
“What’s your name?”
He pulls up his collar against the cold air.
“Eric,” he says. “I’m sorry. I
really have to go. Try to find some place to stay out of the rain.”
“Pip doesn’t like the rain.”
“He’s a nice cat.”
“Yes he is. He’s my friend.”
“Well, guess I better go.”
“God bless you, Eric.”
“Thank you.”
He walks back to the truck and
closes the doors and locks up the milk. He waves before he leaves and
then the truck pulls out of the alley and we stand there until we can’t
hear it anymore.
I feel a drop land on my face. The rain’s starting. I throw the
blankets over my shoulders and we walk down the alley to a spot I know
will keep the rain off us. I find a piece of cardboard to sit on and
the concrete isn’t as uncomfortable and with the blankets over my
shoulder we’re warm enough. Pip curls up in my lap and I gently stroke
his soft fur. I can smell cat food on his soft breath and I can still
taste the sandwich in my mouth. Our bellies are full and we keep each
other warm and watch the rain fall.
It’ll be over soon my bones say.
I tell Pip not to worry, cause rain don’t last forever, and it won’t be
long till the Lord makes the spring come, and then it’ll be warm and we
can sit in the park and enjoy the sunshine.
Originally Published in Bellowing Ark
© 1991 by Daniel R. Snyder
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